Warm up for Anal Sex – At GV we are always stressing the importance of warming up your body before anal sex and a light, vibrating massage on or around the anus can be the just the thing to get you relaxed, aroused and ready to go!

Prostate Play – Take your prostate play to the next level by adding some vibration! Just make sure any toy that is inserted anally (vibrating or otherwise) has a flared base to keep your toy from getting stuck. And always remember to use lots of lube!

Oral Sex Stimulator- Bring some zing to your oral sex by placing a vibrator on your cheek when servicing your partner. The vibrations will carry through your mouth and give your partner an extra thrill.

Don’t want to give up your favorite Dildo? You don’t have to!- Turn any dildo or butt plug into a vibrating toy by placing a vibrator at the base. This works especially well with silicone and will transmit the vibrations though your toy, giving your old favorite a whole new life!

Feel the Vibe- Vibrators can also provide great stimuli to the penis (head or shaft), balls, perenium, nipples or anus. Explore your sensitivities and maybe find some new favorite body parts along the way! Choosing a vibrator with different speeds can help pick out the perfect amount of intensity, and feels oh so good.

So you see anyone can get pleasure from a vibrator, and there are so many different styles, sizes, and functions we know there’s a perfect vibrator out there just waiting for you to discover it!

The good news is that there are tons of inexpensive and creative options to let your sweetie know you care. So if you’re tired of bubble baths and rose petals, read on for some ways to spark your own sexy inspiration for setting up an erotic encounter both of you are sure to remember.

Part 1 — Preparation

Hot Talk
No matter how much we would like to believe we are telepathic concerning our partner’s needs (and vice versa), this just usually isn’t true. Every individual has different ideas about what turns them on and the only way to find out is by talking about it. Tell your partner about your erotic fantasies and ask them about theirs. Perhaps you’ve always wanted to make love at the beach, maybe a certain kind of porn really gets your juices flowing, or confess your secret desire to try out a harness. Then listen to what your partner has to say. Once you have a basic idea, use your imagination and run with it. For example, if your partner loves picnics but it’s the middle of winter, why not try a sexy indoor version. Lay a blanket in the living room and make some sandwiches or pick up some of your sweetie’s favorite treats. You can even get a CD or tape at your local library of nature sounds and play it in the background for effect. Plus, since you’re indoors, you won’t have to worry about people walking in on you (make sure to clear this with roommates and send the kids to a sitter first!). The more you know about your partner’s likes and dislikes, the easier it will be to pick out something special that is sure to have a positive result.

When to Plan and When to Let It Flow
When brainstorming about your erotic exploits, find a balance between planning and setting unrealistic expectations. It is great to have an idea filled with special details, but we’ve all heard the expression about the best-laid plans. Weather, roommates, sudden cash shortages, overbooked hotels and a million other things could pop up at the last second so leave yourself some options. If your entire plan depends on a series of people passing notes and driving around on a strict timeline, you might be treading on dangerous ground. For elaborate gestures, always make a backup plan, even if it is nowhere near as grand as the original. While naturally you are hoping for the best, don’t let yourself be disappointed if your partner doesn’t react the exact way you thought they would in your mind or if your night ends in happy cuddling instead of hot coupling. Let your instincts be your guide for the night — following the plan exactly as you pictured it is not nearly as important as having a great time with someone you care about. If you end up having a wonderful dinner conversation that lasts two hours instead of one and you miss the movie you had planned to see, who cares? A good strategy is to think things out, make sure any special items/reservations/safer sex products etc. are in place for the day of and then just play it by ear. Worrying about whether every little thing is perfect is only going to distract you from what is supposed be a time of enjoyment and connection with your honey.

When Small = HUGE
And no, we’re not talking about that kind of size. Small can easily equal large when it comes to creating something special for another person. The most expensive hotel room in the world can pale in comparison to a cheap or free gesture that really hits the mark. Little details that show your partner that you have listened to their likes and desires can go a long way. If you feel unsure about whether your sweetie likes a certain kind of food or if they prefer blue over green, asking their friends for advice and suggestions could be a great help. Favorite types of flowers and/or sex toys, having fantasy/role-playing props out and ready, a home-made invitation to a sexy evening, making a mix tape or buying a CD by their favorite artist, cooking dinner, or even going that extra mile to make sure your place is clean will help to convey (without words) that you appreciate your partner and they are in for a special time.

Part 2 — Action

Timing is Everything
We are accustomed to thinking of erotic encounters happening primarily at night, so why not treat your partner to a little “afternoon delight” or morning, early evening, etc. Serve them up some breakfast in bed in a sexy outfit (or nothing at all); you could have some condoms/dental dams waiting on the side or served up with “dessert”. If you think it will take you too long to digest, make a breakfast tray that features only condoms, dental dams, sex toys, lotions, and lube as the appetizer (a great way to work up an appetite). Just make sure your partner is a morning person.

Keep ‘em Guessing
Sexy surprises are a great way to set the mood and build up some anticipation. Hide a love note or invitation in their mailbox, purse, briefcase, backpack, etc. with a condom attached. Leave clues around your house/apartment that lead to hidden treasures like toys, lube, condoms, etc. until your partner ends up right where you want them (goodies in hand).  Playing a board, card, or dice game with a sexy theme can work as well. Using clothes, kisses, spankings, and the like as your collateral can create a fun, light tone if you don’t want your encounter to seem too serious.  Taking a little risk can be exciting as well, perhaps try a new kind of condom with a flavored lube, or go to a Good Vibrations store and talk to a SESA about toys, books, movies, and other accessories they might recommend based on your needs and ideas, plus instructions on how to incorporate them into your sex life.

Eye appeal and then some
One of the easiest and still most universal ways to set the mood is through wardrobe and décor. Our physical and visual environment influences our mood. A room scattered with bills, newspapers, children’s toys, and fast food wrappers can be difficult to overlook. While we aren’t suggesting that you replace your furniture, a few small touches (and a clean space) can work wonders on perception. Drape fabrics over existing couches or move furniture around slightly to create different floor and make a familiar room seem completely foreign. Use color, lighting, and small details to create the illusion of entering somewhere new. Look for inspiration all around you. If you want to create a Moroccan theme without breaking the bank, use orange and purple fabrics and put pillows on the floor. It doesn’t have to be perfect or expensive to make an impact.

This holds true for outfits as well. Expensive lingerie can be sexy, but so can formal wear, role-playing outfits, leather, nudity, and so on. Hopefully by now you have discussed what turns you and your partner on. Try picking out an outfit for your partner to wear out of their closet or lingerie drawer (or buy them a new one if you can swing it) and have it waiting for them on the bed when they get home with a note asking them to put it on. Take some time to think about your outfit as well. If you dress in something that makes you feel sexy, it will shine through to your partner.

Porn, or a favorite movie, can help enhance the moment, but don’t forget the other senses. Smell, taste, sound, and touch are equally important in creating an erotic environment. Find the music that works for you, sure “romantic” themed CD’s can help, but Marvin Gaye, Madonna, and even Iron Maiden can get a better result if that is the kind of music you prefer. Incense, flowers, candles, and baking can create a delightful scent, but make sure your sweetie doesn’t have any allergies first. Textures and tastes can be explored through new sheets, blindfolds, full course dinners or just a few tasty tidbits, gloves, vinyl/leather, safer sex products, and so on. A good rule of thumb is to try to incorporate one item for each sense for a well-rounded event. Obviously some will play a more important role than others, and some might not even be consciously noticed, but they will all end up working together to create the scene for your erotic experience.

The most important thing to remember is that this is an encounter that is special for you and your partner, not everyone else. Instead of relying on vague, general “romantic ideas” that have nothing to do with your personal interests, create an erotic environment based solely on what you and your partner think is sexy, stimulating, and enjoyable.  Bubble baths and candles are amazing as long as that is what you want. By talking to your partner and melding their ideas and concepts of sexuality with your own, you can create a unique and wonderful experience that will bring you closer, in and out of the bedroom.

Talk, imagine, plan and enjoy!

Sex toys have come a long way since the bulky machines found in our Antique Vibrator Museum, and we couldn’t be happier about it.

Today you can buy your vibrators, dildos, and butt plugs in a myriad of sizes, textures, colors, and most importantly materials, giving you more choices than ever when it comes to finding a toy that fits both your lifestyle and comfort levels. Now it’s just a matter of making sure your new toys get the special care their specific material requires, and we’ve got all the info to help keep your new toys clean and looking good.

Silicone

There’s a lot to love about silicone—it’s durable, quickly warms to body temperature, retains heat, and it’s non-porous, which makes clean up a snap. Silicone toys can be cleaned with warm water and anti-bacterial soap. Just make sure to rinse thoroughly and allow your toy to fully dry before storing. If you’re feeling a bit more “hands off”, silicone toys can be washed in the top rack of a dishwasher, or sterilized by being boiled in water for under 3 minutes (provided that the toy does not contain any plastic parts). But the main reason we love silicone probably has to do with its velvety soft texture combined with a not-too-hard/not-too-soft flexibility. To keep your toy in great shape, store it upright and don’t keep it in a plastic bag (or the silicone will get sticky).

It is important to note that some silicone toys will actually break down if combined with silicone-based lubricant, so only use water-based lube when necessary. Also, make sure your silicone toy’s surface stays away from sharp fingernails, teeth, pets, and harnesses that don’t have large enough openings for your toy to fit through. Small tears can easily grow into large tears and we’ve never found a glue that fixes them. If you plan on sharing your toy with another person, or switching it from anal to vaginal use, fitting it with a non-lubricated condom (and replacing it between those uses) can temporarily save your toy a trip to the sink.

We have lots of silicone dildos, vibrators and anal toys, making it easy to find one that’ll work for you. Although some manufacturers make toys with silicone blends, which aren’t always non-porous, all of our silicone toys are 100% silicone.
Jelly Rubber
Jelly rubber toys often appear in bright colors and are both flexible and soft. Because jelly rubber is porous by nature, we always recommend using jelly rubber toys with a condom (every time; even if you’re the only user). With any toy, you should always use and change the condom between partners, or if switching between anal and vaginal penetration.

After you take your jelly rubber toy home, remove it from its packaging, wash it and allow it to air out for a few hours. Jelly toys should be washed prior to their first use and again after every use since porous toys hang on to bacteria. The GV Toy Cleaner or the Medclean Wipes do a great job, but you can also use a mild soap and hot water to keep your jelly toy clean. If your toy isn’t waterproof, wipe it with a wash cloth, taking care to remove any soapy residue before allowing it to dry.

If you have a latex sensitivity, you might experience a similar reaction to jelly rubber. Using a non-latex condom such as the Avanti Condoms over your toy, or opting for another material like silicone, glass, or plastic might be something to consider.

While jelly rubber is a bit more high-maintenance than some other materials, it’s got some advantages, too. It tends to cost less, which may make it easier to try something new. While some companies continue to manufacture jelly rubber toys with phthalates, within the next year, every product that Good Vibrations sells will be phthalate-free. Using condoms with them is still a great way to make sure that the porous nature of jelly rubber doesn’t cause problems.

Softskin

Also referred to by some toy companies as Cyberskin, softskin toys are among the most realistically-textured toys on the market. In addition to how its softness and elasticity really reminds us of actual skin, softskin also quickly warms to body temperature and can be stretched, pulled or even yanked without losing its original shape.

Cleaning softskin toys correctly will help keep their texture soft and supple. The GV Toy Cleaner or a mild soap and hot water will do a good job, but softskin is quite porous so even if you’re the only person using it, we recommend using a condom on it. This is especially true if you’re using it for anal play or for women who are sensitive to yeast infections

Always allow your toy to fully dry before storing it and always keep it away from any heat source. This includes keeping your softskin toy away from the sun and other strong light sources, making a cool dry place your best bet for safe storage. Softskin gets sticky when it dries, so dusting your toy with cornstarch between uses is also helpful, but you’ll probably want to wash it off before re-using your toy. One easy way to do this is to put the toy in a paper bag with some cornstarch and shake it up. We highly recommend not using talc for this purpose since talc has been linked to cervical cancer.

Because of softskin’s delicate nature, we do not recommend combining them with jelly toys or even storing softskin toys next to jelly rubber toys, since this can damage the softskin material. If you are using a softskin sleeve, make sure to clean your toy well both inside and out. We also suggest keeping your softskin toys away from silicone-based lube and other oils to keep the softskin intact.

If you like softskin, but want something easy to clean, check out our VixSkin™ toys. While they are a bit more expensive, VixSkin is a 100% silicone product that feels like softskin. They’re amazingly realistic in texture and come in several sizes and colors.

Glass

While at first, “glass” might bring to mind objects known for their fragility; our glass products are stress-tested for the long haul. Constructed from borosilicate glass (the same as Pyrex™) and tested with a polariscope to ensure durability, our unique glass pieces are works of art worthy of being displayed. In addition to their beauty, glass is remarkable for its ability to be heated or cooled to add a whole new dimension of sensation to your play. For heat, submerge your toy in warm water for 20-30 minutes. Depending on the toy’s size and the length of time the toy is submerged, it should stay warm for about 20-30 minutes. To cool your toy, place it in a bowl of ice water for 20-30 minutes or keep it in your refrigerator for at least 20 minutes. Never put your glass toy in a microwave, boiling water, oven, or freezer since those extreme temperatures will weaken the glass.

Since glass is completely non-porous, it’s easy to keep your toy clean with GV Toy Cleaner or soap and water. Stay away from abrasive sponges and cleaners that can scratch your toy’s surface. Glass toys can also be damaged if they collide with another hard surface like cement, metal, or other glass. Since glass is so rigid, many people find that they prefer glass toys to be a bit smaller than their favorite silicone or jelly toys.

Elastomer

Elastomer is a material composed of various polymers that resemble rubber and are as versatile as the toys they go into–ranging in texture, firmness, and elasticity. These toys also run the gamut from being non-porous (the Laya) to very porous (the Maven Sleeve). Please check the product descriptions for each individual elastomer toy on the Good Vibrations web site for cleaning and care instructions.

Metal

You’ll usually find metal used to make G-spot toys, butt plugs and cock rings. Since metal is non-porous it can easily be cleaned with GV Toy Cleaner or mild soap and water. Just make sure to dry well!

Vinyl

Vinyl toys tend to be inexpensive and lightweight, and come in a variety of styles; including toys with flared bases (perfect for harnesses) and those with rubber nubs at the base that can act as clitoral stimulators. Vinyl toys are less porous than rubber, which makes them easier to clean, but they’re not 100% non-porous, so the same precautions for jelly rubber still apply.

Rubber

Like vinyl, many dildos list rubber as their main material and are available in about the same variety of styles. The biggest difference is that rubber toys are heavier than vinyl, and much more porous. We suggest always using condoms over rubber toys to help with clean up and to keep bacteria from becoming lodged inside your toy. It becomes especially important to use a new condom each time if your toy will have more than one user, or if it will be used both anally and vaginally.

Rubber can be tricky to keep clean since it is easy for dirt and bacteria to end up in little pockets beneath the surface of your toy and become impossible to scrub out. Unfortunately harsh scrubbing will only result in creating small rubber pills along your toy’s surface, and is definitely not recommended. If you are looking for a toy with easier clean up, you might consider another material such as silicone, glass or plastic.

If Your Toys Uses Batteries

If your toy contains a battery compartment, make sure that area is closed tight and kept dry while cleaning. Storing batteries outside of your vibrator will help maintain the life of your battery and your vibrator last longer (this will also help to ensure your vibrator is fully turned off and not accidentally left on a low setting). If it’s a waterproof toy, it’s much easier to clean it without betting water inside and ruining it.

Harness Care

Our main suggestion when it comes to the care and maintenance of your harness is to treat it the same way you would any intimate piece of apparel, with delicacy and some much deserved attention. So whether you’re harness is leather, fabric, lorica, or vinyl, proper cleaning will help keep your harness in top condition and made sure it will be ready to go whenever you are.

• Leather: To clean your leather harness, wash with mild soap and water, making sure to allow your toy to fully dry before storing it in order to prevent wet spots from collecting bacteria.
• Fabric: Fabric harnesses can be cleaned with mild soap and water and are also machine washable; we recommend using the delicate setting to keep the velvet lining in tact. Always remember to allow your toy to fully dry before putting it away.
• Lorica: These harnesses can be hand washed in mild soap and water or machine washed on delicate. Always allow your harness to fully dry before storing. It’s also important to note that Lorica is water repellent and permeable to water vapor.
• Vinyl: Taking care of a vinyl harness is basically the same as a fabric one. They can be washed with mild soap and water and are also machine washable (we recommend the delicate setting), and always remember to allow your harness to fully dry before putting it away.

Adult videos, XXX-rated films, and porn can be a great way to explore your sexual desires. Porn is not for everyone, but can be a wonderful addition to your sexual repertoire.

You can watch films alone or with a partner, during sex play, as part of a warm-up or on its own. Porn can be a great resource—you can get inspired to try different positions, discover a hot location to act out your desires, or find a new fantasy. Just remember that these folks are actors and that some of the sex is planned for the best camera angle rather than the enjoyment of the people involved.

There are thousands of titles and, at times, trying to find a movie can be overwhelming. Here are some tips for choosing a new favorite.

Make a list of what you want to see:

• You could be looking for a particular sex-act: cunnilingus, blowjobs or anal sex
• Some movies feature specific groups of people such as: gay men, all-girl, lesbian, heterosexual couples, African-Americans, and women with natural bodies
• There are movies that focus on specific sexual activities: oral sex, anal sex, orgies, and gang bangs
• Storyline vs. wall-to-wall (all sex)—remember that the folks in porn often don’t act very well
• A particular point of view, i.e. a women’s perspective, a partnered perspective
• Some companies churn out dozens of titles per month with little attention given to editing, dialogue or sound while others put more time (and money) into their production. Special effects, original music and top-notch costumes are often featured. You might like the more polished movies, or you might prefer films with rougher edges.

Understand categories; where do stores and web sites file their films, and where can you find what you want?

• Different stores and web sites have different ways of categorizing their movies, so you may have to do a little digging to find what you want.

Here is a list of Good Vibrations’ categories and descriptions:

• Erotic Videos—These films are plot-driven. They will either have a continuous storyline that will tie the scenes together, or, they can consist of a series of vignettes or short stories.
• Wall-to-Wall—These films feature all-sex with little or no plot. They will have a series of scenes not tied to the previous ones, although there may be a common theme.
• Lesbian, Gay Male, Bisexual, Transgender Videos—This grouping of films will have films that reflect these orientations and identities. Please note: “all-girl” doesn’t necessarily mean “lesbian.” If you want to see films that reflect a wide range of lesbians, try lesbian- and dyke-produced films like In Search of the Wild Kingdom, Superfreak, The Crash Pad, or the Erocktavison series.
• Sex Education Videos— These films are great learning tools. There are a wide range of topics one can learn about through Sex-Ed Films. Most of these films have explicit sex, usually to demonstrate the techniques they describe.
• Bondage and Fetish Videos— These films will have a Bondage & Discipline, Sadomasochism, Domination & Submission and/or Fetish theme. They can be feature films or consist of a series of scenes. They can be educational. They may or may not have explicit sex—some states don’t allow movies to have sex scenes while someone is in bondage, so the ropes come off before the sex starts.
• Classic Erotica Videos—These films were made 25 or more years ago. They’re a good place to look if you want to find women that have pubic hair and little-to-no surgical augmentation.
• Women Directed—These films are great if you’re looking for films that have: a strong focus on female pleasure, lots of chemistry between the characters and are from a woman’s perspective. Veronica Hart, Candida Royalle, Shine Louise Houston and Belladonna are some staff and customer favorites.
• New To Watching Porn—These films are great for people that are new to porn or for couples. Most of them will be plot-driven with more attention given to the production quality. These are often ideal for people that want a feature film that goes “all the way”.
• Award Winners—These films have all won awards; mainly at the Adult Video News (AVN) annual awards ceremony.

Keep in mind there may be some overlap. For example: a film may be both “Women Directed” and an “Award Winner”.

Where to go for more information:

• Read a book—The Smart Girl’s Guide to Porn is an extremely comprehensive resource. The book has descriptions and information on range of directors. You can also read detailed descriptions of the films. General sex guides like will often have a video section or chapter where they will recommend films. The Good Vibrations Guide to Sex has a videography, cataloging film titles and directors that readers may enjoy.
• Read the films description in our catalog or on the web site— In addition to descriptions, we also provide icons that highlight noteworthy aspects of the films we carry. We have icons for: superior filmmaking, chemistry between partners, lesbian theme, unconventional sexual content and many more. Look out for them and use them.
• Read the Box— The box may not tell you everything but it may mention or show something of interest, especially once you are familiar with the actors, directors and production companies.
• Read a Review— www.AVN.com has thousands of reviews of adult films in every category imaginable.
• Ask our Staff— Our Sex Educator/Sales Associates are extremely knowledgeable about our entire product line, including films. Or, if you feel comfortable, ask a friend.
• Video on Demand/Pay-Per-Minute – Online or in-store digital downloads are an easy and commitment-free way to watch adult films. You can rent the films for fraction of the retail price and purchase them after seeing them. Visit our online VOD www.goodvibes.com for more information.

Remember—the fast-forward button is your friend.
You don’t have to watch every second of a movie. Most DVDs have chapters set within each sex scene so if you want to skip the oral sex, or watch it again, you can. Some companies create menus that let you watch just the sex acts you want to see.

Enjoy!

The G-spot can be a place of mystery for those searching for that hidden treasure. Many folks have heard about it, but their spelunking efforts have been unsuccessful. In fact, some doctors may even say that the G-spot is a myth. That, my friends, is like saying that having a femur is a myth. All of those lucky enough to have a vulva and vaginal canal have a G-spot. Whether or not one likes having their G-spot stimulated may be the real question.

The G-spot has many aliases; the urethral sponge and the female prostate (or prostata femina) are just a couple of its other names. Anatomically speaking, the urethral sponge is located towards the anterior (towards the belly) part of the vaginal wall. When aroused this tissue swells up and becomes engorged with blood, just like a penis. It is sometimes actually visible at the vaginal opening. The urethra (the opening that urine and female ejaculate comes out of) is surrounded by the G-spot. If the vaginal opening were a clock with the clitoris at noon, the G-spot would be located between 11:00 and 1:00. The G-spot is not very long…it only runs about 2-3 inches deep inside of the vagina.

Where and how exactly someone prefers to have their G-spot stimulated can vary from person to person. Some may enjoy having the area just at the vaginal opening fingered, licked, or massaged. Others may prefer applying lots of pressure in just one spot of the female prostate. Some might get off on having the length of the sponge stroked. This can be especially effective if one were laying on her back and someone would insert a finger or two pointing up towards her belly, then stroking the fingers in a “come hither” motion.

Our first words of advice to those wanting to explore G-spot stimulation would be to wait to stroke that wonder spot until you are very turned on. It is of utmost importance for folks to have gone through the physiological changes of arousal before you go poking around in there. Not only is the G-spot much more receptive to pleasure once it has become engorged with blood, but the inside of the vagina changes as well to accommodate something to be inserted, whether it be a finger, toy or a penis (or a zucchini, or a gearshift…).

When a woman gets aroused, the vaginal walls lubricate and actually kind-of balloon open, and the cervix lifts. Many folks who have tried stimulating their G-spot before they are fully aroused complain of the sensation feeling irritating or uncomfortable. Keep in mind that the arousal cycle for women tends to be much longer than for men, and to really enjoy the realm of sensation that G-spot stimulation can offer; it’s best to be patient.

Some folks prefer to have their G-spot stimulated once they are on the verge of orgasm, during or after. That way, the physiological changes of arousal are well under way. For those who are new to G-spot stimulation, it is common to feel the urgency of having to urinate. Chances are, you don’t actually have to go to the bathroom, it’s just that the urethral sponge is so closely connected to the bladder and all the other equipment designed for urination, that it’s the only sensation your body can associate this new sensation with. Most people who feel like they have to pee during sex will most likely stop having sex. Then you go to the bathroom, and only a couple of drops come out. For those worried about the possibility of peeing during sex, I have two suggestions: 1.) Pee before you have sex so you are certain that your bladder is empty. 2.) When you feel that sensation of having to pee, just continue with the stimulation. Chances are that feeling of having to pee will subside, and could conclude in an orgasm from G-spot stimulation.

There are a variety of methods that can be effective in stimulating your G-spot. A favorite and very successful G-spot stimulator is someone else’s fingers. Fingers are great! You can bend them, add more girth, and provide varying amounts of pressure unlike most toys or a penis. Although there are positions recommended during penis-vaginal intercourse for G-spot stimulation, it can be one of the more unsuccessful attempts at really getting to that right spot. Most often a penis will just glide on by, and not provide the necessary pressure many people need in order to feel the waves of ecstasy when they are having a successful attempt at stimulating their G-spot.

In terms of toys, the firmer, the better. Many stainless steel and glass toys are on the market, and these can be great G-spot stimulators because they are so rigid. We’ve got a lot of vibrators and dildos that work well for G-spot play as well. Many of them are curved to create sensations of stroking or pressure. Quite a few of our silicone dildos have ridges or prominent heads, which may also do wonders for the G-spot. Check out the Rippler, the Bullseye and the Right Spot for examples.

Keep in mind that sex is like food. Just because one person loves green bell peppers doesn’t mean that everyone will. Same thing goes with our sexual preferences. Just because your best friend loves having her G-spot stimulated doesn’t necessarily mean that you will. You’ll at least have fun trying, though, right?

There’s a saying about the depth of women’s hearts being as deep and wide as the ocean and therefore cannot be fully known without exploration. While this isn’t exactly the phrase—it has been altered for modern purposes—the expression translates very well when thinking about the ways of vulva worshiping and clit hunting, also known as cunnilingus. Let’s face it, when it comes to going down on women, it’s like a treasure hunt with a wonderful reward. Sexperts have found that less than one-third of women orgasm by penetration. That makes sense when the clitoris’ pure purpose is pleasure; just a bundle of 8,000 nerves waiting to be seduced—truly a jewel. To be sure, not everyone likes treasure hunts, or jewels, so before setting out on the exploration, it is wise to check in with your partner. But, if you’re up for the adventure, continue on in search of the treasure.

Preparation for the Hunt

Just like with any other treasure hunt, there is a map and clues. After that, it’s about communication and instinct, especially when dealing with myths that need to be exposed and tossed overboard.

Keeping Clean

Of the three main concerns about cunnilingus, hygiene is often at the top of the list. The external female sexual organs are collectively known as the vulva. The vulva has many functions, but unlike men’s sexual organs, the parts that make up the vulva don’t multi-task. Perhaps this is the only area in women’s lives where each part has a single distinct function and purpose.

Not only that, but vulvas are self-cleaning. The acidic fluids of the vagina constantly wash away any unwanted bacteria that cause infections. The catch is that vulvas are outdoor girls, so they need fresh air and breathing room in order to remain healthy. Being indoors causes too much moisture, and therefore an unpleasant atmosphere. How’s that for easy cunt care and maintenance?

It shouldn’t go without saying that being safe is a priority. If you are unsure about your partner’s sexual health status, it’s best to talk about it. But, if you haven’t had a chance to discuss it, you might consider using a dental dam with lube. While not every sexually-transmitted infection can be passed via oral sex, some can. Dental dams are rectangular pieces of latex which protect both people from possible STIs.

One dam we recommend is the Slicks Dam—it comes ready to go in a condom-size package and smells (but doesn’t taste) like strawberries. These dams are thin, but strong, and offer plenty of room to safely explore.

A dam is only as good as the lube that goes with it. If you like strawberries and you want more than the scent; O’My Flavored Lubricant has a strawberry cheesecake flavor. If your sweet tooth isn’t tingling with delight, a good non-scented and non-flavored dam to try is the Good Vibes Dental Dams. Pink Lube is a great lube to use with either of these dams since it isn’t flavored or scented, but provides protection for sensitive skin. This lube also comes in a pretty bottle, making it perfect for your nightstand.

If safety isn’t a factor, but you or your partner is concerned about the scent and taste of your sacred garden or jungle, there are several ways to address it.

The first is to get to know yourself, or have your partner get to know you, by tasting and smelling the juices that flow through your vulva. By doing this, you and/or your partner will be able to detect if something isn’t quite right down there. It’s good to be familiar with the territory, because each visit is never the same as the previous, which increases the intensity of the treasure hunt each time; either with the partner you’ve been with for decades or someone new.

The second easiest way to ensure a clean start for your journey is to bathe, either together or separately. Running water through an exposed vulva, while gently pulling back the lips to ensure crevices are cleansed, provides a pleasant sensation both physically and mentally.

Breaking the Rules

The second fear people have about providing lip service or muff diving (a couple of the slang terms for cunnilingus) is the social taboo, either legal or religious. Some people like the adventure of doing something that isn’t expected of them to do, while others don’t savor such adventure.

Currently, there are 12 states that still have active sodomy or sexual misconduct laws. In most states these laws aren’t actively enforced, but a signal was sent by the U.S. Supreme Court in 2003 when it struck down Texas’ sodomy laws as unconstitutional. These laws infringe upon consenting adults’ privacy. Over the years, legal and religious control over sexual social behavior has declined as access to sexual education has opened the landscape for pleasure.

Is is Really Sex?

The third fear people have about going down is that’s its not “real” sex and therefore in some way relates to their masculinity, femininity, or sexual orientation. For some people, oral sex is “just foreplay” and only intercourse counts as real sex. Here at Good Vibrations, we believe that there’s nothing wrong with oral sex leading up to intercourse and there’s also nothing wrong with oral sex on its own. It’s simply another form of sexual expression and pleasure.

Many people find that spending an evening focusing on feeling good and sexual pleasure, rather than a particular type of sex, can take a lot of the pressure off. If you’ve never tried it, you might want to give it a shot and see how it feels.

The Tools

Any good explorer knows the tools that are needed for a journey. That doesn’t necessarily mean that what is on hand will work for each excursion. Depending upon your partner, there are numerous ways to coax the pearl out of hiding.

The required tools are simply a good tongue, fingers, and sometimes even a nose. Teeth should rarely be used unless gently and with your partner’s consent. With all of its nerve endings, the clitoris tends to be quite sensitive. Of course, clear communication, either by direct and/or verbal and physical cues from your partner, should be a good indication of when something is being done right or isn’t working.

The Map

Clitorises, like penises, vary in size and shape. Some protrude from beneath the clitoral hood and can be as large as the first knuckle on your thumb, while others are barely visible even when aroused. Not only do clitorises vary in shape and size, but so do the lips of the vulva. Much like people in general, vulvas don’t look the same. Good examples of the various maps of the vulva can be found in Femalia or The Cunt Coloring Book.

The “pearl” of women’s pleasure is buried beneath the clitoral hood, folded under the inner and outer labia of the vulva. The clitoris rests beneath the mons, within these folds of flesh. While the tip of the clitoris is what people generally envision about this jewel, there is more beyond the tip. The clitoris actually has legs (the crura) that stretch beneath the surface, around the urethra, and end just inside of the vagina where the famed G-spot resides. This provides many opportunities for arousing exploration.

Seducing the Jewel

Like any treasure hunt, a little preparation goes a long way. Providing a comfortable atmosphere and finding the right position for relaxation will make the exploration pleasurable. Some women find that a pillow under their hips makes oral sex easier and you may find that it keeps your neck from getting crunched. Other possibilities include having her at the edge of the bed while you kneel on the floor (on a pillow!) or sit in a chair, lying on your back while she straddles your face and having her bend over while you lick from behind. There are lots of options, so you can find all sorts of ways to have fun. The Wedge and Ramp pillows can make many different positions easy and fun.

Even if you know where the clitoris is, it’s often best to approach it with care and sensitivity. Often, diving in doesn’t do the trick. Instead, start off by working your way down with your lips and tongue; caressing, massaging, and kissing along the way. Once in the area, gently massage the mons with your hands or lips teasing as you move towards the inner thighs, repeating your massaging and kissing techniques and adding a little nibbling; if your partner likes it.

Listen to signals that your partner is ready for you to begin exploring the outer labia, but still don’t go directly to the clitoris. Instead, gently pull back the outer lips and run the tip of your tongue along her inner labia using your saliva to assist with lubrication.

Some women like the feeling of being blown on, and it increases their arousal. If your partner is sensitive, she may or may not like this. You partner might enjoy penetration while being aroused as well. This might be a good “come hither” way of seduction, especially by inserting your finger inside her vagina, in search of her G-spot. To find it, insert your finger and curl it (in a “come hither” motion) and feel for a firmer area of tissue. Pay attention to her responses, both verbal and non-verbal.

Continue kissing, licking, and sucking on her inner lips. Erogenous tissues reside just beneath the surface, as well as in the legs of the clitoris, increasing not only her arousal, but her natural lubricating fluids. The clit needs continuous lubrication, so the more your partner is aroused, the more natural fluids (along with your own saliva) will provide comfort and pleasure.

Work your way slowly towards her pearl, but still don’t go directly to the clit. Rather, circle around it with your tongue to coax the pearl out of hiding. Continue by alternating between the use of your tongue and lips. Different states of your tongue provide different sensations. A tense stiff tongue provides a firm flicking motion that is good for teasing, but a flat limp tongue is best for sucking. Both styles of the tongue are good at different stages of arousal.

Once you are ready to begin to directly stimulate the clitoris, swirl your tongue gently around the clitoral hood, stimulating the clitoris to bring it out of its secret place. You can also move your face in circular motions while holding your lips and tongue still. It can take a while for many women to climax, so pace yourself.

At this point, you may find that keeping your tongue relaxed while sucking works well. As she gets closer to climaxing, she may tense up or press her vulva towards you, since some women want firm pressure as they approach orgasm. Whatever you do, if you are on the spot, don’t stop your motions…continue until she climaxes. Nothing is more frustrating than being near orgasm, and then suddenly being interrupted by motion away from the spot. When this happens, get back to the spot as quickly as possible, otherwise you will find yourself in a cycle of starting all over again—and it can lead to over-stimulation (the clit is very sensitive) or your own tongue fatigue.

If for some reason your partner doesn’t climax, don’t think that the journey was a failure. While clitoral stimulation does lead to orgasms for many women, just like everything else, orgasms can be affected by many other factors. Seducing the jewel is a journey that’s a pleasure to take, and she will always adore you for it.

If she does orgasm during oral sex, keep doing what you’re doing until she signals for you to stop. Many women tend to orgasm longer than men do, often multiple times. Sometimes women even ejaculate. The fluid has a sweet smell and is liquid, like urine, but is not urine. So, don’t be alarmed, be extra pleased about her pleasure. When you’re both feeling done, kiss her vulva gently; or, resting your head on her thigh can be a sweet way to keep the connection until she’s done.

Remember, these helpful hints won’t work for everyone. If you’d like to learn more about cunnilingus, check out The Complete Guide to Oral Lovemakingand Violet Blue’s The Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus, where you’ll find more tips that’ll drive her wild.

However you like to do it, here are some tips for making it as fun as it can be. As with all sexual experiences, some basic guidelines will help make the sexual expression more enjoyable and positive for all participants.

Talking About It
Both the spanker and the spankee need to want the experience. Talking about whether spanking can be a part of sex play usually works best when it happens before your evening of passion. That’s not to say that there’s no room for spontaneity, but rather, you’re more likely to be able to ask for what you want and hear your partner’s requests when you’re not turned on. After all, many of us have made decisions under the influence of lust that we might not have made under other circumstances. The clearer you are about what you want or what you might like to explore, the more likely it is that you’ll get it.

There are lots of ways to introduce the topic. You might try some of these techniques:

• “I really like it when…”
• “I have a fantasy about ______ and was wondering if you would want to…”
• “I really get turned on when…”
• “I’ve always wanted to try…”
• “Remember in that story when that woman got spanked? I’ve been thinking about it a lot.”

Keep it positive, and let your partner know how sexy and fun you think spanking is. However they feel, try to be appreciative of their honesty and understand their view as much as you want them to understand yours. Talking about sex is often one of the biggest challenges in relationships, so be gentle with each other.

It will probably also help if you’ve taken some time to think about some of the things that might or not be ok for you, such as:

• Redness or bruising. Some people may enjoy seeing some marks after a session. Other people may want no redness or marks at all. As part of that, how easily do you bruise?
• Do you want to try toys or stick with hands?
• How will you tell your partner when it’s getting close to too much? (A scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being “I need to stop” is a great way to convey that.)
• Do you have physical limitations that might affect things? For example, if you’ve got carpal tunnel syndrome, you might need to keep pressure off your wrists instead of being on your hands and knees.
• Do you want to weave fantasy into your spanking? If so, what words, positions, or other sexual activities will make it work for you?
• Since our limits may change when we’re turned on, how can you check in with each other without breaking the mood?
• Do you prefer a thud or a sting sensation? Checkout the Types of Sensation section below to learn more about thud and sting.
• Use safewords. Safewords are code words for things like “I need to take a break” or “too much.” They can be easier to use during the heat of passion and they give room for playing with fantasies where no doesn’t necessarily mean no. Some popular ones are “red” (to stop) and “yellow” (to slow down).

Fantasy
Some people spank because they enjoy the opportunity for power exchange and role play, in addition to the pleasurable sensations spanking provides. Power exchange is where one temporarily relinquishes control to other. Role play is great for all the actors at heart who love the idea of playing, whether it is: student and teacher, cops and robbers or patient and doctor. It’s always important to keep in mind the words of super-sexy expert Nina Hartley, “the role play is no more symbolic than what the players want.”

Role play can be as simple or complex as you want it to be. You can find inspiration in your favorite movies, books, and erotic films. Some people find that they return to the same fantasies, while others find that after playing it out once or twice, they’re ready for a new one.

Technique
A key component to having spanking be pleasurable is location, location, location.

Location:
Focus your spanking the buttocks. Always avoid impact on or above the tailbone, outside of the buttocks, lower thighs, the back of the knees, and where the bottom ends and the thighs begin. It’s easy to damage the tailbone or kidneys if your spanking gets out of the safe zone. And anyway, most people find that it feels best on their butts.

You can create different sensations by having the receiving partner in different positions. If they’re lying flat on a bed, their butt is less stretched out than if they’re bent over or on their hands and knees. Many people find that the further their hips are bent, the stronger the same impact can feel.

The Warm-Up:
When we get spanked, more blood flows to the skin, the muscles relax and arousal builds. Warm your partner up with softer spanks. Massage the lower back, hips, butt and thighs — the more relaxed we are, the better spanking can feel. Watch their body language for cues that they’re beginning to get turned on. You may want to include other stimulation such as genital play or light scratching and tickling to heighten sensation.

When your partner is warmed up, their skin will probably feel warmer and (depending on their skin tone) may be a bit pink. They may also relax into the sensation or make appreciative sounds. However your partner expresses their pleasure, make sure to linger here before taking it further — you’ll be rewarded later.

Types of Sensation:
All spanking props whether they are a bare hand or paddle will provide sensation along a spectrum of sting to thud. Sting is felt more on the surface of the skin while thud is a deeper, more penetrating sensation. Some people have strong preferences for one or the other, some like both and some like one as part of a warm-up and the other later on.

If you’re not sure what you or your partner likes, start slow and ask. One great way to do that is to spank once and ask them to rate it on a scale of one to ten. Another way is to do two different strokes and ask which one felt better. And remember that what we like changes when we’re turned on and warmed up, so feel free to mix it up a bit.

Here are some more tips on different sensations:

• Thud
  A palm of the hand or thick heavy paddle can provide deep, resonating, penetrative yet dull, deep tissue stimulation. In general, it is harder to leave long-lasting marks with thud props, although when you do, the bruises may last longer since they’re deeper.
• Sting
  A light wooden paddle, wooden spoon, and a hairbrush can provide more shallow stimulation, a sharp biting. Try our Star Spanker or Slapper to experiment with sting.
• Different hand shapes
  When spanking with a bare or leather-gloved hand, cupping the hand tends to create more thud while holding it flat with fingers spread creates more sting. Some people find that having the hand or paddle bounce back off the rump after a strike to be more pleasurable for both parties, rather than striking with solely a forward motion. Others like a “spank-and-grab” sensation.
• Rhythm
  Find a nice, steady rhythm. Some people like to time it to the music they’ve got playing. Just change it up every so often to keep arousal up.
• Change the Sensation
  Work some light stroking, scratching, and rubbing into your spanking. Try incorporating the bristle side of a hairbrush after a few strokes of the opposing side. Some paddles will have a soft faux fur on one side and leather on the other. Play around with different stroking patterns and props until you and your lover find some favorites.
• Be Aware of Your Partner
  The spankee can give cues that particular stroke pattern or strength is enjoyable by wiggling or squirming in your lap, or letting out a squeal. They can also let the spanker know something was not so enjoyable by saying things like: “no not there”, “too hard” or “that didn’t feel good.” Discuss, prior to your spanking session, what cues or safe words will be used and what they mean.
• Afterwards
  You may want to shift from spanking towards other sexual activity. After all, now that you’re both turned on, there are so many other things to do! But afterwards, it’s often a good idea to check in with each other. What worked? What didn’t? What would you like to change? You can have those conversations right afterwards or maybe a day or two later, but make sure to have them. It’s one of the best ways to make sure that the next time is fun.

  If the spankee is looking a bit bruised, some arnica gel (available at many pharmacies and natural food stores) works wonders. It also helps with muscle aches, so it might feel good on the spanker’s arm, too!

  Resources:
  If you’d like to find out more about spanking, discover some fun new toys or read up on BDSM, here’s the best place to go: search our entire online store!

How to Go Down on a Woman

Oral sex, going down on a woman, or cunnilingus (derived from the Latin words cunnus, meaning “vulva”, and lingere, meaning “to lick”), is a wonderful act that two people can share. When fully appreciated and recognized it can mean to admire, to have deep respect for, or worship the woman and the vulva. In addition, it has the added bonus of feeling divine.

Back to the Basics:
As with all ideas of sex, (partner, solo, BDSM), some basic fundamentals or rules apply. We always need to make sure the sex is consensual and safe. The doors of communication should be open throughout.

Anatomy: Know It
One crucial component of getting and receiving amazing oral sex is, knowing what you are trying to please and why it feels good. Both the provider and the receiver should be able to map out a woman’s genitals.

Fear + Anxiety = No Orgasm
Relaxation + Comfort = Orgasm
A relaxed, confident woman will have a much easier time reaching orgasm than a woman who is worried about how she looks and smells.

It’s safe to say that most peoples’ early sex education memories are not of holding a hand held mirror and examining their genitals. Maybe you received little information, or maybe your genitals were labeled “No Trespassing!” Or maybe it was very medical sounding, without any way to make it connect to your body. Whatever your sex education was, very few of us were fortunate enough to have been told or shown how each and every vulva is unique and beautiful.

Lack of information and mis-information can lead to fear and embarrassment about ones genitals. Many women will than compare their vulva to what is portrayed in magazines and mainstream porn and will think what they have isn’t “normal”. As a result, many women feel embarrassed about their vulvas and shy away from oral sex. In reality, vulvas come in all shapes, shades and sizes. The book Femalia is a revolutionary book, it does an amazing job of depicting the range of women’s vulvas. Pierced, not pierced, no hair, hair — all can be seen and admired in the beautifully shot, color photograph collection. Learning to admire your or your partner’s vulva is one of the most potent aphrodisiacs, especially when it comes to cunnilingus.

Safer Sex
Safer sex is easy to do and important for a several reasons. If you are with someone new or have multiple partners, safer sex will protect yourself and your partners. Since many people have been exposed to sexually transmitted infections without knowing it, safer sex can protect everyone, monogamous or not.

For cunnilingus specifically, dental dams make an excellent barrier. Dams are rectangular sheets of latex or non-latex, that can be used to cover all of the women’s vulva, anus and perineum. We carry our own GV Dental Dams, which come in a variety of sizes. For our latex-sensitive lovers, we have the Hot Dam made of 100% non-latex polyurethane. For the people on the go, and out on the town, our Slick Dams come in a convenient foil wrapper.

To protect hands and fingers from infections that are easily spread through contact
(i.e., herpes), finger cots and gloves can be worn.

Lubricant can be a great addition to oral play. It helps keep everything nice and slick. Flavored and warming lubes provide a fun flare and flavor burst when used during oral sex. Flavored lubes will work especially well with partners who are a little self conscious of their scent or taste.

• O’ My Flavored Lubricant comes in delicious flavors, is latex-compatible, is sugar free and all-natural
• Good Lubrications Warming Gel warms on contact, with friction or by being blown on

Foods like honey or whipped cream can be great when used externally, but it’s a good idea to avoid getting them in the vagina since they can trigger yeast infections.

Turn the Lights Down Low
If you or your partner is new to oral stimulation, or shy, setting the mood will make all the difference. Candlelight and warm bath can work wonders. The bath will relax away any reservations a wary partner may have. Men may also want to shave so they can avoid friction burns in tender places.

Positions
Have your partner recline comfortably in a big chair or in bed. If she would like added control, have her sit on your face. Place a pillow or the Wedge under her hips or have her lie near the edge of the bed so you can kneel on the floor. The more comfortable your neck is, the easier oral sex will be.

Your Rhythm is Gonna Get Her
Trying to use as many strokes as possible in the shortest period of time is not always the best approach when performing cunnilingus. Instead, concentrate on providing pleasure, excitement, and arousal by stimulating the entire vulva and slowly working up to an orgasm. Gradually work your way down from her mouth to the vulva.

• Use slow warm kisses to trace a trail to her vaginal lips
• Gently kiss and caress her inner thighs
• Make sure to repeatedly tell your partner how beautiful she and her vulva are—your words can be as important as your other techniques

Here are a few strokes that can be incorporated into your licking repertoire. Pick a few to try and stick to the ones your partner seems to enjoy. People will often find that just because one move pleased one partner, it doesn’t mean that same move will please another.

• Lick her up and down, across the vaginal opening to the hood and back down again
• Incorporate sweeping broad stokes with a flat tongue, side to side with fast, quick upward stokes, than dip back down, dipping your tongue in her vagina
• Open and close your mouth, taking in the whole vulva
• Run your tongue along the inner lips
• Gradually, incorporate more direct stimulation around and on the clitoris
• Outline circles with your tongue around the clitoral hood
• Try incorporating subtle sucking on the clitoral hood. This move is one that some may enjoy and some may not. You can test the waters and ask your partner if it feels good.
• Try anal stimulation (”rimming”), with a barrier. Giving partners can lick the anal opening and along the perineum. Be careful! Change gloves and dams, and wash hands thoroughly after anal play. This move will also please some but not all. Discuss anal play beforehand with a partner.

Body Language — Read it, Become Fluent in It
Throughout the act of cunnilingus, partners play out a song and dance. Givers will need to rely on reading their partners’ body language for clues indicating pleasure.

Discuss beforehand your partner’s preferences. Know if your partner feels more comfortable having you ask if: something is okay, fast enough, and soft enough. Or, if she would prefer to tell you when she wants you to stay in one place or go faster. Encourage her to tell you what she likes and dislikes, and how she wants it. Or if she has trouble describing it, give her two options and ask her which feels better. You can also try something and ask her to rate it on a scale of 1 to 10. The easier it is for her to tell you what works, the easier it will be for you to do it with confidence.

When your partner is too deep in rapture to speak feel confident that clear body signals can be understood.

• The genitals will swell and flush and as she becomes more aroused
• When she approaches orgasm, she may begin to sway and rock, or bump and grind against your face.
• She may become more and more wet; secretions will flow

Once orgasm is inevitable, many people it is best to stay with a single stroke and continue to do whatever you are doing. Do not experiment with a new stroke — it often interrupts her arousal.

Toys
Oral stimulation doesn’t have to be limited to only using the mouth to provide stimulation — it can be performed in conjunction with dildos, vibrating toys, and anal plugs.

• The Fukuoku 9000 is a great finger tip vibrator that can be seamlessly incorporated into oral and finger play. The vibrator has easy to clean silicone tips, and runs on watch batteries, so there is no need to worry about bulky battery packs. If the idea of swapping out watch batteries doesn’t sound pleasing, try the Chandra, a rechargeable finger tip vibrator.
• The Tongue Joy can convert any everyday tongue, into an oral sex machine on a mission. This vibrator is worn around the tongue and can be worn comfortably with our without a tongue piercing.
• A glass dildo like the Aurora, can make a delightful contrast between, the warm soft mouth of a lover and firm cold glass.
• The Little Flirt, found in the Angelic Anal Kit is an excellent, stay put silicone anal plug, great for people new to anal stimulation. Silicone is a non-porous material, so clean up is snap. The toy can be boiled for a few minutes or thrown in the dishwasher.

Have Fun!!!
As long as you communicate clearly with your partner, gradually provide stimulation, listen, and tell her how beautiful she is, you can’t go wrong. And remember that practicing can be fun too!

For those sex nerds who want to know it all, check out these additional resources:
Additional Resources

Books:
The Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus by Violet Blue
Tricks to Please a Woman by Jay Wiseman
Good Vibrations Guide to Sex by Cathy Winks and Ann Semans

Videos:
Nina Hartley’s Guide to Oral Sex
Nina Hartley’s Advanced Guide to Oral Sex
The Complete Guide to Oral Lovemaking

San Francisco Sex Information
www.sfsi.org
415-989-7374

Change Your Perspective
One of the most important aspects of introducing a new routine into your sex life is looking at it in a positive context. How much fun is it going be if every time you look at a condom or a dental dam you see it as a “barrier” that is just getting in the way? Instead try to take the opposite approach. Think about safer sex products as a kind of permission slip, once you put it on, you can now relax and enjoy your sexual escapades knowing that you have taken the best possible precautions against unwanted incidents. Peace of mind can be a great turn on.

Make Yourself A Sex Kit

We have first aid kits, make-up kits, bike repair kits, even fishing kits — so why not build your own sex kit? You can include your favorite toys, condoms, lube, candles, music, even breath mints. Check out GV’s extensive line of kits to get you started or to provide some great inspiration, then just pick up a Devine Toy Satchel or Devine Box and start your own. Fill it with whatever supplies you would like to have handy and keep it in a special place. Then, every time you open it you’ll get a giddy sense of pride and excitement as your eyes feast on all of your favorite sexual ingredients. You can even do this on a smaller scale and make it travel-sized like the Pleasure Plus Condom Case, Just In Case or Overnighter Kits, so you know you can be safe wherever the moment finds you. Putting on a condom might get boring, so why not let your partner help. Try rolling the condom onto your partner with your mouth (you might want to practice this first on a toy or a banana). The easiest way is to place the condom in your mouth behind your teeth, using your tongue to hold the tip in place while you roll down with your lips. You can also incorporate condoms, dams, and gloves into your foreplay with a sexy game (this works especially well for those who love role playing and/or some Submission/Domination action). Hiding a condom or dam somewhere under your clothes or sneaking it into your partner’s bag, purse, day planner, etc. is a great way to create an association between condoms and a sexy surprise. Another great idea is to take your sweetie to a Good Vibrations store or check out the web site together to find the products you’d like to try, and you can always ask our friendly and knowledgeable SESAs for assistance, either at the store or with our live chat.

Variety Is The Spice Of Life
We are lucky to live in a time with many, many, choices when it comes to our safer sex products. Try experimenting with different colors and textures of condoms. Some are designed with special ribbing to make sensations more sensitive, others are wider, thinner, thicker, you name it. If you don’t like the taste of latex, why not try a flavored lube or get creative with some supplies you might have around the house. Chocolate syrup, honey, or even whipped cream can be used over condoms and dental dams (just make sure you replace it if there is going to be any vaginal or anal penetration later, and keep sugar out of the vagina — it can trigger yeast infections).

Try using different colored gloves; this will come in handy to tell which ones are used for vaginal or anal entry. If you are not fond of having a glove over your hand, try finger cots. If you want to increase the sensation for your hand wearing a glove, a few drops of lube inside the glove (after you put it on) can make it feel like it’s not even there. If you are out of dams and have a latex glove available, simply cut the fingers off and slice open one side for a flat surface. You can also try this with a condom. When you find the products you enjoy using they become less like obstacles and more like extra toys that help enhance your overall experience.

Forget Everything Else
While penetration is fun, don’t lose sight of everything else your partner has to offer. Kissing, nibbling, cuddling, massage, and mutual masturbation are only a few of the many ways we can experience safe sexual pleasure outside penetration. Finding new ways to give and receive pleasure are always exciting to discover and can also help keep your sex life from getting stale.

Consistency
The more often you include safer sex products into your life, the sooner they will become natural elements of your sexual routines. When we repeat an action often enough, we become accustomed to it being there, and it feels less like an intrusion.

Like most everything else in life, imagination is key. Finding new ways to give and experience pleasure is a lifelong pursuit. By consciously thinking of ways to incorporate safer sex products into your sexual endeavors, you’ll essentially be thinking about new ways to experience sex. This can lead to all kinds of wonderful possibilities, and at the end of the night, you’ll know that you are protected.

Watch the GVTV episode HERE!

Things to Consider:

Before slinging on a harness to use with a male partner, take care to gently warm him up.

You can start building the heat by sharing some fantasies when you’re in bed together. You can talk about how hot he is, and how well you’re going to do him. By the time you’re advising him to clean himself thoroughly in preparation (and if that’s with an enema, at least two or three hours before you take him), he’ll already be right there, craving you.

When laying out your gear, think more “lush spa” than “clinical chic”, though there’s often a place for that in some fantasies, too. Set out a stack of soft towels, several pairs of latex or nitrile gloves that hug your fingers, extra non-lubricated condoms to cover your toys, lots of lube, and your harness, tightened to your specifications. You may want to practice putting your harness on to get the fit just right. The better prepped you are, the smoother everything will be. Getting everything ready can have an erotic charge, too, turning you on and revealing your strap-on sexual personas — whether that’s a wild femme top, a cool and collected lady, a fierce and tender partner-in-crime, or all of the above.

When it comes to that first entry, keep close to him as you find his anus with your fingers. You can tease the skin there between his legs with your hands, while stealthily wetting your gloved hand with lube. A no-pressure way to test him is to place the soft pad of your finger against his anus, and wait. Does he buck back into your hand? Quiver a bit and yield? If you’re sweet like that, let him drive for a moment. Or, if you know he can take it, be firm and slide in.

Keep things creative and moving with your warm-up, pressing your body against his, warming his bottom with your thighs or breasts, building a bit of a rhythm with your strokes — shallow, deep, and still. Take your own strapped-on cock against his, slide it between his cheeks, or slap him with it wherever you like. Think of taking him not because he wants you to do him, even if he is thrashing and moaning like a total do-me queen — take him when you crave taking him.

When you’re ready, let him feel your cock bearing down a bit near your finger, or fingers. As you wet your cock with more lube, you can tease him more by stroking it, showing off for him. Listen to him. Watch his breathing, or tell him to breathe the way you want him to, to get ready for you. Thrust with your hand against him as he exhales. Pause on his inhale. Give him time.

Notice your tendency in this moment: do you want to check in with him about the intensity and speed? Do you go deep into your own body and thrust with abandon? Try to strike a balance of the two, blending careful observation and confident strokes. Once you’ve found your pace, experiment with what gives you access to all the rest of his body. As you slow down, you can find his nipples with a free hand, or knead his cock and tease his balls. Cup his head and tug his hair to see how hard he wants it. While kneeling up in front of him, clench his ass cheeks with both hands, bring him to the level of your cock, and freestyle with the harness.

When it comes to anal-play orgasms, men have some widely varying responses. You may already know about some of his. Strap-on sex may provoke shuddering, deep, whole-body orgasm in him, or bring him to ejaculation without any direct stimulation of his cock. He may need you to withdraw from his ass as soon as he comes, or he may be mid-wave and want to keep with it. Either way, a graceful finish is key to keeping things hot.

With a towel ready to warm him, slowly slide your cock back towards you and out of him, and loosen up your straps enough to bring your harness off. Add the whole works to another towel (cleaning in hot, soapy water is for later), peel off your gloves inside-out, and get your bare hands back on his body, bringing him back, taking in his afterglow.

Or, think of what you want, once he recovers, in return.