Good Vibrations Magazine

Whats the best path of treatment for vaginismus? Are there any good online resources for self-help? (asking on behalf of my gf)

I’m not sure about the vast range that the online world offers re: this, but there is a substantive-looking site called vaginismus.com which is certainly worth exploring. And there has been one good book written about Vaginismus, which is a condition which involves the vagina not relaxing enough to allow for comfortable penetration — sometimes the tightness is so extreme that even a finger can’t be inserted without pain. Its functional definition refers to the inability to have intercourse.

“is “stone butch” with us today? if so, has this sexuality changed, remained the same, both?”

I’d say yes to that, although many of the people who would have been identified as stone butch in the old days are now viewed as genderqueer or some variation thereof; whether or not she/ze/he’s a very butch woman or a transman, some such masculine folks are more comfortable being the “do-er” (top, active partner) sexually (as if you can’t be active as the “receptive” partner… oh, words fail us). But the notion of “stone” is two-sided: on the one hand, it means “very very”; on the other, it refers to an unwillingness (or orientation away from) being the receptive partner during sex.

@GoodVibesSF What is the best route to becoming a sex educator?

Great question! The simple answer is, major in sexology or sex ed in a recognized program. But that answer is actually way too simple, because there aren’t very many of these programs, and there’s more than one kind of sex educator. The sexologist is clearly one. Many of these programs are pretty academic and ready you mainly for academic careers — which is great, if that’s what you had in mind. If you’d rather live the swashbuckling life of a sexpert, who may have no formal training but lots of real-world experience and knowledge, start amassing (and evaluating) your real-world experience! These folks often wind up teaching classes, writing books, and often being pretty big deals.

If a guy doesn’t climax after 20 mins of foreplay and 30 mins of sex does it mean the sex is terrible?

Oh, this is an awesome question! No, it doesn’t necessarily mean the sex is terrible at all. It might be so great that he’s trying with all his will not to let it end — so many people, of all genders, are trained to think that when a guy comes, the sex is over, that many men try hard NOT to climax! And that can train a man, whether he intended to do so or not, to have a hard time coming at all. (Of course, in reality, the sex doesn’t have to be over until everyone involved has had enough fun, or until it’s time to catch the bus for work, whichever comes first.)

dear carol hi my name is mark … since your a sex therpist this is my question i have a problume getting erect when i was younger at age 18 i got super erect now that i am 42years old i am haveing trouble geting erect i diabetes type2 can you give me advice on what to do or what kind of help i need thank you mark

Hi Mark! Thanks for writing, and apologies that I’ve been traveling and didn’t get right back to you. First I have to clarify that I’m not a sex *therapist* — I’m a sexologist, and my training is a little different than that of a sex therapist. But let me get to your question.

First, it’s natural for a man to have stronger, quicker erections at 18 than later in life, but just getting to age 42 is not a guarantee that you should notice much less ability to get erect.

Recently I had begun reading the Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability. I am always eager to read a book on sex, and those for special needs always interest me. This one was exceptional. I suppose I have known for a long time that those with disabilities also enjoy sex. Of course they do! It [...]

Let’s all head for the back door!
I want to talk about a subject that for a lot of people are still afraid to talk about. This is a very pleasurable activity and yet, it still has a stigma or Taboo. I am talking about ANAL SEX OR ANAL PLAY. Yes I am putting it out [...]

Sounds like a new diet book. The new elixir of life guaranteed to bring you money, riches, the new love of your life, fame…you fill in the rest.
However for a perimenopausal woman dealing with the mood swings weight gain or headaches that brings PMS on steroids 25 days out of the month to your [...]

In the course of my career as a sex educator at Good Vibrations, I have had numerous conversations with customers and it is always amazes me with their very interesting philosophies and views I hear about sexuality.
Some things are enlightening. Some comments make me take a deep breath and hope they can’t see the [...]

Joan Price, author of Better than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk about Sex After Sixty, and blogger on BetterThanIEverExpected.Blogspot.com has some pretty great things to say about The Cone Vibrator.
She writes, “My first introduction to the Cone Vibrator was at the 2008 AASECT (American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists) convention. Lively and handsome [...]

There’s nothing as hot as being yourself—except possibly being yourself being somebody else.
Exploring those alter-egos hanging around behind-the-scenes in your erotic fantasies can be a fun and fulfilling way to uncover what turns you on. Even if you don’t feel totally ready yet to claim those desires, erotic fantasy play could give you a [...]

Hey you! Yes, you with the butt….it’s anal health month, have you heard? And you know what that means don’t you? Time to pull out the toys (so to speak) and focus your attention to the rear.
We’ve collected some of our best anal-play products, articles, videos and education pages here in one place like one [...]

Vibrators are seen as a “woman only toy” when that couldn’t be farther from the truth! We’ve included a few of our favorite tips to help you discover why vibrators aren’t just for the ladies.

Valentine’s day is one of those holidays that usually starts out as a nice idea, but all the pressure of finding the perfect gift can turn this tribute to romance into a full blown stress disaster. If you’re finding yourself in a crunch trying to pick out the right item, here’s a few things to [...]

Romance is indeed a fickle thing. Between work, school, family obligations, hobbies, and even can’t-miss TV shows, it often gets put on the back burner of a busy week. When you find yourself feeling (or notice your partner feeling) bogged down by the everyday, you can use it as a great opportunity to create a [...]

So by now hopefully our gift guides have helped you narrow down what you’re getting for that special someone on your list, but what about everyone else? In addition to our great toy and porn selection, GV offers a lot of really fun items perfect for friends, family, and co-workers. Read below for some friendly [...]

Who says Oprah gets to have all the fun? If I had a studio audience, I’d be sending all of you home with these sweets delights sure to brighten any season. Plus, I do enjoy making you these gift guides to help ease the burden of stressful shopping, especially since we have so many new [...]

As I’m sure many of you have noticed, GV has recently added dozens and dozens of new porn titles to our roster. While we LOVE increasing our video diversity, trying to find the right video out of all these new films can be quite daunting. So, in order to make your shopping a little easier [...]

As we each settle down with friends and family over the Holiday Season to eat some yummy food and give thanks for all the wonderful people and things in our life, we here at Good Vibrations know that some of the things we’re most thankful for include a long list of new and exciting products that will certainly make our season [...]

from the Info Desk: Sexual Health Product Info

Sex toys have come a long way since the bulky machines found in our Antique Vibrator Museum, and we couldn’t be happier about it.
Today you can buy your vibrators, dildos, and butt plugs in a myriad of sizes, textures, colors, and most importantly materials, giving you [...]

From GV’s Info Desk: Sexual Health/Product Info
Did you know that your body can develop sensitivity to latex products? Many folks who have used latex barriers for years without any problems may one day discover that now, all of a sudden, when using latex dental dams, gloves or condoms they develop a rash, or skin irritation [...]

When Angelina came into the GV offices, everyone gathered around. “What an interesting shape,” “what’s up with that bump?” “check out that handle!” As you can guess, it wasn’t Angelina Jolie that waltzed into GV, but a unique dildo from Jollies, LLC. Because I wanted to know more about the origins of this great toy, [...]

A Few of My Favorite Bondage Things
(from GV’s Info Desk: Sexual Health/Product Info)
Bondage, even with its kinky rep, has a totally charming sort of cross-sex-cultural cachet. For many people, it’s both sincerely perverted, yet sinfully delightful. No wonder it’s part of many, many fantasies.
These days, having the desire to tie up and tie down your [...]

From GV’s Info Desk: Sexual Health/Product Info
Adult videos, XXX-rated films, and porn can be a great way to explore your sexual desires. Porn is not for everyone, but can be a wonderful addition to your sexual repertoire.
You can watch films alone or with a partner, during sex play, as part of a warm-up or [...]

There’s something about wood—the smooth surface, the beautiful grain, the beauty only found in nature…. When our Senior Toy Buyer came across the NobEssence line, she was immediately struck by both the design and functionality of the stunning wood toys. The product line is diverse, with something for everyone.