Good Vibrations Magazine

By Allison G.

Midori is a woman of many trades. She is an accomplished author, Japanese Rope Bondage expert, lecturer, humanitarian, sex-positive educator, as well as an artist (and few more other talents, I’m sure). Whether you’ve read her books, taken any of her classes, heard her speak at events or conferences, or participated in any of her amazing weekend intensives, you know Midori is an energetic force to be reckoned with. As if someone with a resume this long doesn’t have enough on her plate, Midori is also an avid fundraiser, especially for Aids LifeCycle. On April 25th at the Citadel in San Francisco, Midori will be throwing her annual Bang 4 The Buck Women’s Party and we were lucky enough to find time to sit down with Midori and get the scoop on this incredible event. At the end of the interview keep reading to find out how YOU and a friend can win FREE Tickets to the party of the year.

Q. What is the Bang 4 The Buck party and how did you first decide to start it?

A. I came up with the idea for the Bang 4 The Buck women’s party in 2004. Kelly B and I are both dedicated roadies for the AIDS LifeCycle event. AIDS LifeCycle is this amazing, crazy 7 day bicycle ride from San Francisco to Los Angeles to raise critically needed funds for HIV services. About 3,000 riders and 500 roadies participate. Roadies do all sorts of support work, such as setting up the campsites, food service, safety, rest stops, etc. As roadies we don’t have to fundraise but I’m compelled to. I’ve had enough with my friends getting sick. While it’s not like the earlier days of all the funerals, every week, it’s still bad. More and more younger people are getting infected. It’s increasing among people of color. Yet the funding seems to be fading, people are getting apathetic, the government just wants to preach abstinence and send funding to warfare, not health.

Sometimes I feel like we’re trying to dredge a tsunami with garden buckets, but it really does make a difference. What AIDS LifeCycle does is make education, prevention, counseling, testing, housing, medicine, etc possible. That’s less suffering in the world.

Usually those of us who do AIDS LifeCycle ask our friends for donations. To tell you the truth I’m horrible at that. I just feel bad about it. I know that times are tough for many of my friends, and I get really shy about asking. (If you’re reading this and you do want to sponsor me, just drop by my sponsorship page at http://www.aidslifecycle.org/8081 where you’ll see a goofy photo of me!) So I wondered what I might be able to do… That was about the time when there weren’t any really good women’s parties around. I also noticed that at many women’s parties there really aren’t any good flirting. People come with their regular dates, chat with their friends, play and then leave. That’s not so much fun for singles, new people or those of us shy people. I remember how hard it was when I was first going to women’s bars or parties to just connect.

So I figured the time was ripe to create a different sort of party! An exciting party where all women felt welcome, where along sex and kink were equally enjoyed, where those who just wanted to take a peek in on the wild side could do so safely, and meet new people. Bang 4 The Buckwas conceived . But I couldn’t do it myself. So I enlisted the talented Miss Indigo Blue, a saucy burlesque teacher and performer and Lydia McLane, a sexy go-getter, both from Seattle. Kelly B, an amazing project manager by trade, lend her logistical organization. Lee has joined us later, providing us with her problem solving skills. Then I turned to my organizational and corporate friends in the sex supplybiz. They all stepped up! They’re all giving us goodies for the HUGE raffle table and many are providing other help as well as sponsoring the ridefinancially. Good Vibrations, The Pleasure Chest, ID Lube, Babeland, SocialKink, Stormy Leather, Syren, Stockroom, Twisted Monk, Desire and International Ms. Leather Weekend became part of the Bang family.

Every year we do one Bang 4 The Buck party in Seattle and San Francisco. The Seattle party is at the Sex Positive Community Center, who have provided the most amazing organizational help. They’re a remarkable group. In San Francisco, the Citadel welcomes us with open arms. They’ve been an important supporter of the Bang cause all along.

That’s how Bang 4 The Buck came to be!

Q. How long have you been involved with raising funds for Aids LifeCycle?

A. Kelly’s been involved with fundraising for SF AIDS Foundation in various forms since 1994, including California AIDS Ride and all of AIDS LifeCycle. I’ve been involved since 2003 but I’ve been doing grass roots HIV and safer sex education since 1994 starting with the San Francisco Sex Information services.

Q. What advice do you have for someone who has never been to a Women’s sex and play party before?

A. First of all, the first half of the event isn’t a sex party or play party. So if a gal isn’t feeling comfortable going to a sex party there’s still plenty of fun for her. The Strip-O-Rama is just a totally exciting event and we love having tons of women in the audience cheering and screaming. Each year the crowd’s grown. This year we’re expecting 250 to 300 women to show up!

After 10pm the sex and play party starts. Here’s what you can expect. Many people will be playing and sexing with the date that they brought with them. If you’re looking for people to play with or get it on with, flirt with them and then ask if they’re interested. No one’s going to just grab you and do things without your consent. Most people like to dress up in something special, whether it’s sexy wear, sultry wear, a strap-on or just your sexy naked self. If you’re in a monogamous relationship it’s fun to make out and shag with your partner in this sexy environment. There’s no expectations to participate with others. Of course, if you’ve always wanted to invite someone else to play with, with no strings attached, this is the event! If you’d like help in approaching a hottie, ask an Ambassador.

These are people who are there to help you get to know the space, and they can also do introductions for you. Ambassadors are also there to help you with any questions on etiquette or making the most of the evening. If you experience any problems, we have Play Space Monitors to help address them. Like any playground of pleasure, after you’re done with an area please clean up. There are safer sex supplies available, so please do use them.

My advice:

- Do wear something that makes you feel sexy and attractive.
- Be ok to say “Than you, no. It’s my first party so I’m just enjoying watching”
- Do bring your own favorite sex toy if you’d like to get off solo or maybe share with a new friend. Don’t forget an extension cord if you’ve got a plug-in toy.
- If you find someone hot, say hi. If you don’t ask, you won’t get any action.
- If someone says no, it’s ok, it’s not a personal rejection.
- Don’t take photos in the party
- Do smile a lot. It makes you approachable.
- Do keep chatter down to a whisper in the play area
- Do ask questions with the Ambassadors, Hostess and Monitors
There is a really helpful FAQ section at the party web site:
http://www.Bang4TheBuck.org

Q. What is a Party Ambassador and what do they do?

A. The Party Ambassador is a volunteer who is there to answer any your questions about the party. They can give you a mini tour, tell you where you can find things, give you info about the raffles and special event features. They can also introduce you to new friends or help break the ice for that hottie you spotted.

Also if there’s any problems at the party, let the Ambassador or other volunteer know. Maybe the toilet paper’s out, you need help with a spill or someone’s not being nice. Just let us know!

Q.. This is an alcohol free event, why did you decide to go that route?

A. Cleaner carpets?
LOL.

It’s actually a function of venue as well as common sense. To have the sort of party I want to, where adults can have exciting consensual sex and the strip competition can take it all off, I needed a sex club. Local regulations make these places alcohol free. I also
think that one misses out on a lot of sensual and sexual pleasures if their system’s numbed or depressed as alcohol does. What people choose to do before or after the party is their own business. During the party, however, I want to make sure to provide a safe and welcoming place.

Q. What is your favorite part about throwing this party?

A. The off-the-hook energy of thrill and joy! All the cheering for the Strip-O-Rama alone is enough to blow the roof off the building. It’s really exciting!

Q. I know you host these parties in both San Francisco and Seattle, any plans to expand it to other cities?

A. Not at this time. It’s a lot of work for the whole the Bang Crew. Since 100% of the profits goes to AIDS LifeCycle, two events a year is about our limit in terms of energy, time and personal resources.

Q. Do you have any other projects, parties, or fun news you’d like to share with our readers?

A. Having just said that it would be hard to extend myself further for philanthropic work, I just added another party. But this one is great for everyone! I decided to throw a special birthday party on May 2nd at Beach Blanket Babylon. Beach Blanket Babylon is the longest running theater show in San Francisco with song, dance, tons of zany outfits and a sharp wit for social satire. For one night only it’s my party and all the proceeds will go to, yes, you guessed it, AIDS LifeCycle. You can only get tickets for this via my site:
http://www.PlanetMidori.com/bbb I really hope all of you can join me!

If anyone has any questions about the parties or stuff I do, they can
just drop me an e mail at: ask@planetmidori.com

***

The GV Weekly and Midori will be giving away 2 PAIRS (that’s 4 tickets) to 2 lucky ladies to get into the Bang 4 The Buck Party on April 25th. To win the tickets email submissions@goodvibes.com with “I want to Bang 4 the Buck” in the subject. Be sure to include your name, email address, and a few brief lines about why YOU should win the tickets in the text by 4/22/08. Since this is a Women Only party, you need to be a woman and over 18 to win. Good Luck!