A Vibrator for Grandma, Part III
By Zoe • Feb 19th, 2008 • Category: Family, G-Spot, Politics, SESAMy grandfather is driving and my grandmother is in the passenger seat. I sit in the back, reading. We’re taking the hour-long drive to visit relatives. As my grandfather pulls over and leaves the car to ask for directions, my grandmother swivels toward the backseat and asks, “What’s that you’re reading?”
I look up from my book and answer with a smile, “The Many Joys of Sex Toys.”
She recites a monologue of emotion:
Surprise: “What are you reading—a sex book??”
Exasperated disapproval: “Oh, Zoe! Why are you reading that!?”
And finally, curiosity: “Well, what’s in there anyway? What’s it about?”
“Well, gram, it’s a book about sex toys and creative ways of using them.”
“What—sex toy? Like what? What’s a sex toy?” She is flustered and speaks rapidly, loudly, but without anger, as she always does when processing an unfamiliar subject.
“You know, vibrators and—”
“So what does it say about… about sex toy?”
“Well…right now I’m reading about the G-spot—”
“The what-spot? G?”
“The G-spot,” I repeat, and ask sincerely, “Do you know what the G-spot is?”
The shrillness leaves her voice. She has forgotten herself.
“No. What is it?”
I explain to her the anatomy of the G-spot. “It responds well to pressure when you’re aroused. Some women really enjoy it.”
“And, … it’s inside?”
“That’s right”
“And… what do you…how do you… get to it?”
“Well, you could use your fingers, but a toy might work better, although really it depends on your anatomy.”
“Your anatomy?”
“I mean the way that your body is built. Everybody’s different so… some people might do fine with their own fingers, but other’s might need a toy, or someone else’s fingers, to reach their G-spot.”
My grandfather returns to the car, and my grandmother turns away sharply, like a child caught cheating in class: “Shh! Grandpa’s coming!—Don’t talk about it in front of him.”
