Comments on: Positively Sexy http://magazine.goodvibes.com/2007/12/19/positively-sexy/ Sex Blog and Erotica from Good Vibes Thu, 18 Mar 2010 05:38:52 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: mandy http://magazine.goodvibes.com/2007/12/19/positively-sexy/comment-page-1/#comment-12543 mandy Sun, 23 Dec 2007 00:58:14 +0000 http://blog.goodvibes.com/2007/12/19/positively-sexy/#comment-12543 Word! I know exactly how you feel and I'm glad you wrote it out, thanks! Word! I know exactly how you feel and I’m glad you wrote it out, thanks!

]]> By: Nico http://magazine.goodvibes.com/2007/12/19/positively-sexy/comment-page-1/#comment-12542 Nico Thu, 20 Dec 2007 13:50:27 +0000 http://blog.goodvibes.com/2007/12/19/positively-sexy/#comment-12542 Very good post, Red. I can only imagine how frustrating it might be for SESAs at times, when having to face such behavior from [non-]costumers. I witnessed that two weeks ago at your Valencia shop and I found it sad to hear people display such a lack of respect for others. I guess some of the blame, if I can say so, goes to a certain level of ignorance of not only the "thing" (i.e. sex, toys, gender, orientation, etc.), but also ignorance at a basic social level. People who are judgmental and narrow minded tend to be so because of a lack of knowledge and understanding of a subject matter. We see this in people's reaction towards everyday's life issues: homelessness, substance abuse, immigration, sexuality, religion, etc. I acknowledge that my own reaction to some issues sometimes comes from my lack of understanding and not knowing better. However, like many people, I work hard at asking questions and trying to get different perspectives on such issues to help me understand things better and accept them for what they are. I think we /all/ are guilty of this same problem, but with some people needing a lot more work than others. I think you nailed it right on the head when you (or your mom) said "More important [...] was a person's willingness to listen..." For someone to open up, s/he must want to do so. We cannot assume that someone will change for the better without them wanting so. For that matter, we too have to show certain open-mindedness in accepting /their/ narrow-mindedness and their choices, even if it may not seem right. We have to do our best by offering these people options, but our aim should not be to convince them or to expect them to change. Perhaps it will be a waste of time as they might refuse to listen, but at least we do our job by offering them a new perspective. Of course, this kind of teaching of tolerance should start with our children to help them grow into more accepting and more open-minded adults, but it is never too late to encourage the same tolerance with current grown ups. I think SESAs at GV do an awesome job. Like Kuono, when I first went to a GV store about 10 years ago, I was quite shy about it (not knowing what I exactly wanted, not knowing what/how/who to ask for advice, feeling afraid of being judged by other costumers, etc.), but the wonderfully trained staff of the GV stores made every visit more fun, interesting, and educational. Kudos to all of you Very good post, Red. I can only imagine how frustrating it might be for SESAs at times, when having to face such behavior from [non-]costumers. I witnessed that two weeks ago at your Valencia shop and I found it sad to hear people display such a lack of respect for others.
I guess some of the blame, if I can say so, goes to a certain level of ignorance of not only the “thing” (i.e. sex, toys, gender, orientation, etc.), but also ignorance at a basic social level. People who are judgmental and narrow minded tend to be so because of a lack of knowledge and understanding of a subject matter. We see this in people’s reaction towards everyday’s life issues: homelessness, substance abuse, immigration, sexuality, religion, etc.
I acknowledge that my own reaction to some issues sometimes comes from my lack of understanding and not knowing better. However, like many people, I work hard at asking questions and trying to get different perspectives on such issues to help me understand things better and accept them for what they are. I think we /all/ are guilty of this same problem, but with some people needing a lot more work than others.
I think you nailed it right on the head when you (or your mom) said “More important [...] was a person’s willingness to listen…” For someone to open up, s/he must want to do so. We cannot assume that someone will change for the better without them wanting so. For that matter, we too have to show certain open-mindedness in accepting /their/ narrow-mindedness and their choices, even if it may not seem right. We have to do our best by offering these people options, but our aim should not be to convince them or to expect them to change. Perhaps it will be a waste of time as they might refuse to listen, but at least we do our job by offering them a new perspective.
Of course, this kind of teaching of tolerance should start with our children to help them grow into more accepting and more open-minded adults, but it is never too late to encourage the same tolerance with current grown ups. I think SESAs at GV do an awesome job. Like Kuono, when I first went to a GV store about 10 years ago, I was quite shy about it (not knowing what I exactly wanted, not knowing what/how/who to ask for advice, feeling afraid of being judged by other costumers, etc.), but the wonderfully trained staff of the GV stores made every visit more fun, interesting, and educational. Kudos to all of you

]]> By: Kuono http://magazine.goodvibes.com/2007/12/19/positively-sexy/comment-page-1/#comment-12541 Kuono Wed, 19 Dec 2007 19:28:19 +0000 http://blog.goodvibes.com/2007/12/19/positively-sexy/#comment-12541 Here, here!!! I remember the days (about five years ago) when I would come to GV and feel so incredibly shy. I worried who would see me looking at what section of toys, and I was nervous to ask questions because I didn't want to look a SESA in the eye when I asked them. Over a series of trips to the store, I slowly came out of my shell. I'm so grateful for GV's Valencia Street and Berkeley store for helping me be more proud of my sexuality. Thanks for the great post, Red! Here, here!!!

I remember the days (about five years ago) when I would come to GV and feel so incredibly shy. I worried who would see me looking at what section of toys, and I was nervous to ask questions because I didn’t want to look a SESA in the eye when I asked them. Over a series of trips to the store, I slowly came out of my shell. I’m so grateful for GV’s Valencia Street and Berkeley store for helping me be more proud of my sexuality. Thanks for the great post, Red!

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