hardcore plugged in.
By jameson • Apr 17th, 2007 • Category: BlogLanguage Suggestion of the Week: Yeast infections and athlete’s foot are both candida infections which affect different parts of the body. “Yeast infection” sounds nasty and cottage-cheesy. “Athlete’s foot” sounds tough and itchy. I move that we start calling vaginal candida infections “Athlete’s Vagina”. Much better, no? And the commercials for Athlete’s Vagina would feature Mia Hamm, or Peaches, or Camille Toe (no offense, Camille; but wearing tight, synthetic-fiber, camel-toe-inducing jumpsuits is a sure-fire way to get Athlete’s Vagina). Ads would tell women “Cure your Athelet’s Vagina, and get back in the game!”.
Cool Sex Toy of the Week: Power tools. My girlfriend has decided to make her own cabinet/shelf/things for our living room, and in doing so she’s enlisted me to help with random sanding and such. If I wanted, I could hop over to Ken’s Twisted Mind and buy a dildo attachment for my drill and really help with the scewing. How hot would that be? Instead of grasping your delicate-seeming (and finely crafted) glass Spectral (which is only available in the stores but well worth the trip), you can drill a cock into your partner. Oh. My. God. I pretty much don’t even care if it feels good, the idea alone is that hot.
(And last night I totally had another porn dream. My lady and I were watching sexvids in front of a bunch of people and touching each other and no one seemed to notice or care. I was very confused, and kept wondering about my outfit.)
Porn Watching Tip of the Week: Masturbate your partner from behind while watching the movie. Sit on the couch or on the bed as if you were going to give them a massage or a french braid: one of your legs to each side of their body, their back against your chest. Wrap your arm around their front and jerk/diddle away until they explode. This way your partner can focus on the film and have whatever facial expressions they want, and not feel guilty for not wanting to make romantic eye contact when there’s an amazing double anal onscreen.
All about the dp,
jameson.
jameson >> a very wholesome looking pervert who is a sex cheerleader by day, super sex cheerleader by night. she majored in women's studies but hates assumed gender differences, loves porn, and was never taught how to think her words are worthless, so obviously she likes to write (and talk and talk and talk, fast).
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