hard times.
By jameson • Nov 1st, 2006 • Category: BlogLast night was Halloween. I stayed in with my girlfriend. We ate spagetti and meatballs and watched Halloween (1, 4, and “Resurrection,” which stars both Busta Rhymes and Tyra Banks). Before dinner and the movie, however, I had to walk through the masses of people heading to the Castro from the BART station. This proved difficult.
Making your way through scantily (skankily?) clad women and their barely costumed men made me angry. Really angry. I knew all these people got off the train from “somewhere else” and were going to the Castro to get drunk and laugh at the gays (not that most gays party in their home district on Halloween…that was Saturday. Last night was not a local community event). By the time I made it to the station, I was fuming. “We are not your freaks to laugh at!” I thought. “Why come into the gayest part of the gayest city if you don’t like gay people?!”
I was angry. Angry angry angry, and then when I came to work this morning I hear that at least 9 people were shot in the Castro last night. I know that not all straight people (from San Francisco and elsewhere) are anti-gay. And maybe the shootings weren’t gay motivated. However, fun things like calling people fags and, even better, fucking fags, did happen, and were gay motivated.
I am still angry. This is not okay. I say we “have” Halloween in the Marina next year. (p.s. anyone notice how shit like this doesn’t happen at pride? exactly.)
Moving on.
Things haven’t been easy lately. I don’t know what’s wrong with my mood, but it’s been favoring “quiet and introspective, with a dash of sad” instead of the usual “crazyperky coated in happy and then fried.” And in my odd quietspace I realized that there was something I needed to say to all you sextips people, and here it is:
I understand that sex is not always easy. I know that sometimes there are issues that aren’t fixed with a vibrator, or a sex game, or a sensual massage. Sometimes it’s easy to sit here and write my lil’ blog and think of all the fun and dirty things that you (anyone, really) can do in bed. But I just wanted to say that I know sex isn’t always like that, and to let you know that it’s totally okay to go through a “dry spell”, or to be not really into sex for a bit. I talk alot about how most people just need an ounce of permission in order to live out their millions of happily nasty fantasies, but great sex isn’t all we need permission for. So here it is. You have permission to put sex off if you need to. You have permission not feel guilty about wanting to sleep instead of fuck. You have permission to take a break and get your brain and your heart together before you jump into thinking about sex and what to do or where to go with it.
Yes, sex is very important. But it’s not everything.
What it is, and what it can become, is up to you. Whatever your mood may be, and wherever your life may take you.
Permission, granted.
.jameson.
jameson >> a very wholesome looking pervert who is a sex cheerleader by day, super sex cheerleader by night. she majored in women's studies but hates assumed gender differences, loves porn, and was never taught how to think her words are worthless, so obviously she likes to write (and talk and talk and talk, fast).
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