fancy sex.
By jameson • Aug 18th, 2006 • Category: BlogToday before work I went to the local “trendier than thou” coffeeshop and ordered a large coffee. The first time I went there I ordered a vanilla latte. “We don’t do vanilla. We don’t do any syrups, actually. And? If you want my expert opinion, I would reccomend not sweetening our coffee at all.” These obnoxious words came from the tattoo-covered, hipster-haircut-sportin’, tight-jean-wearing skinny man behind the counter. I could have smacked him.
I love sweet coffee. Sugar sugar sugar. Bring it on. For some random fool to tell me his “expert opinion” on a subject I know much about really pissed me off.
So I obviously still frequent that coffeeshop because it is, after all, the cool place to go. And this morning, when they handed me my large cup of coffee, I laughed to myself (okay, Iaughed out loud a little bit) as I poured mountains of sugar into my coffee. Mountains, people. For real. Mountains.
Who really has the “expert opinion” anyway? I know what I like my coffee to taste like. I like it sweet. Sometimes I like it vanilla-sweet. I do not like dark bitter coffee.
“But Jameson! This is a damned sex tips blog! Why the hell are you talking about coffee?!”
Quiet women will ask quiet questions that sometimes go like this: “Do you think I’m an old prude for just wanting a simple vibrator?” or “Is there something wrong with me for not wanting a vibe? I really like the way fingers feel better….”
Answer? No! No I don’t think you’re a prude, no I don’t think you’re broken because you don’t like vibes. Actually, I’m always impresed when a woman admits that what she really likes isn’t necessarily what she’s told she should like.
At Good Vibrations, we sell sex toys. We love sex toys. We love it when people embrace their sexuality and experiment with sex toys. We also understand, however, that everyone isn’t going to like everything. Not all of you are going to be into fancy sex things. Embrace your sweet vanilla sex like I embrace my coffee flavored sugar!
Do what works for you. Work what makes you happy.
And try things more than once. I thought Thai food wasn’t for me. Then last night I ate at Osha Thai. Now I am a believer. I also thought all lubes would burn. Then I tried Slippery Stuff Gel. Now I can’t pump enough.
I also tried my coffee without sugar after the sillytrendyboy said I should “just appreciate the coffee.” Hated it.
I am the authority on the subject of me.
Become your own expert opinion.
.jameson.
jameson >> a very wholesome looking pervert who is a sex cheerleader by day, super sex cheerleader by night. she majored in women's studies but hates assumed gender differences, loves porn, and was never taught how to think her words are worthless, so obviously she likes to write (and talk and talk and talk, fast).
All posts by jameson
this b.s. happens all the time at that place. I enjoy quite a bit of sugar and I can always feel their intense stares as I ruin the coffee with sugar.
Adorable. Perfect.
PS. I like my coffee sweet, too!