Good Vibrations Magazine

by Judi B.

Our SESAs — Sex Educator, Sales Associates — are amazing people. Imagine having a head full of knowledge about everything from human anatomy to silicone, from how aging affects sex to how to have better orgasms. If Jeopardy had a sex episode, I’m sure our staff would be the “Ken Jennings” of the show. Yes, they are that good.

I’ve never worked in a GV retail store, but I have been lucky enough to spend some quality time with someone who has logged many a’hour among the aisles of toys, lube, books and videos in one of our Bay Area stores.

Recently I asked my co-worker, “JS”, questions that may be beneficial to customers and potential customers who may be thinking about visiting one of our four stores for the first time…and here is a transaction of our conversation:

What’s the most frequently asked question from someone who’s a first-time shopper at GV?

Short answer: Show me the most popular vibrator.
Long answer: I don’t want to generalize, but it seems that customers that have never been inside of a Good Vibrations retail store are still very familiar with our products. That is, they have experience ordering from our catalogs or our online store. So, first timers into the store usually comment on how excited they are to finally visit the store in-person, and to comment on how clean and well-merchandised the store is.

I am always happy when a customer mentions that this is their first visit to GV and I make sure I say, “Welcome!”-and to let them know if they have any questions to flag me down for assistance. This interaction is followed up at times with the question: “What is your ‘best-seller’?” — usually referring to vibrators.

Most customers are interested in being shown which vibrator is most popular and which one they should buy. Of course, I explain that everyone is different, but I still show them the Rabbit Pearl and the twice as nice section, and the G-Swirl and G-Twist.

What is the most popular item that’s requested?
Again, I would say most people want to see the best-sellers. So the Top 10 list of different toys and lubricants are posted around the store for our customers to browse. If I had to name one or two toys that are constantly being asked about, hands down-the RABBIT (Pearl)! And the LAYA! I feel like everyone probably has one of each of these by now…that’s how popular they seem to be!

In terms of Men’s Toys, it would have to be the Aneros.

And with regard to lubricant-hands-down Good Lubrications Cream for water-based lubricant and Pjur Eros for silicone. Because these two lubes are by far our best-sellers, when we run out of these, some people get sad.

Should people have certain questions in mind when coming in for their first time?

Umm…that’s a good question. I guess the one thing that comes to mind is just to be open-minded about everything we carry. That is-everything we carry is not for everyone. And just because you are not into sensation play or anal play does not mean that those around you are not. So, do not be verbally shameful about some of the products we carry-because the customer next to you might be looking for the biggest ass toy we carry. AND THAT’S OKAY. You probably wouldn’t want someone to publicly put-down something that you are into!!

By the same token it’s not important for you to come in with questions in mind, necessarily, but to remember that it’s okay to ask any SESA for help. That is, if you have a burning question about a product, or need a suggestion-know that it’s okay to ask, and we welcome your questions. That’s what we’re there for-and to know that we are trained to answer your questions, no question is a stupid question, and we have probably been asked it many times before!

And on the same note, explore our store for new things. A lot of customers come in looking to try new things or looking for something to surprise their honey with on their anniversary, I think that is awesome. It’s always helpful to come in with something in mind first, or to productively browse the store-because you know your honey better than I do.

What do you think is most surprising thing to the 1st-time shopper about GV?

I think one of the most surprising things for first-timers into our stores is that we carry so many vibrators! It’s probably overwhelming to some. Our stores are pretty big, and that we carry A LOT more in our stores than what you see in our catalog.

What’s the most unusual question you’ve been asked?

A customer came in wanting to buy a vibrator for his girlfriend and proceeded to give me physical attributes-like, “she’s pretty short, so should I get her a small one?” I know he meant well, but…I explained to him that all women, and everyone really, is different, and their physical height and weight doesn’t determine the size of vibrator they might like.

What’s the nicest thing a customer has said to you after you’ve helped them?

I have received many, many genuine thank you’s from customers. I think most of those thank you’s have been from women of all ages, shapes, and backgrounds who have wanted help purchasing their very first vibrator. It is a very rewarding job in that respect-knowing that I have helped them, help themselves. Also, most of these same customers are extremely grateful that Good Vibrations exists and are happy to share that sentiment with me-which makes me happy to be a part of such a caring company.

What is something someone has asked for that we didn’t/wouldn’t carry, and for good reason?

It’s surprising that many people do not know the horrible side effects of spermicide. A lot of women/hetero-couples inquire about which condom or lubricant contain spermicide-that is, actively looking to purchase one. It gives me an opportunity to inform them about the caustic attributes of Nonoxyl-9, a chemical comparable to the ingredients in bleach! YUCK! There are a lot of health risks associated with Nonoxyl-9, like vaginal/cervical irritation which may increase risk of STD transmission. In fact, recent data indicates that frequent use of Nonoxyl-9 may increase the risk for HIV transmission during vaginal intercourse. Scary stuff.

Has anyone ever tried to sell you on a toy design they had in mind?

Yes. It happens every once in a while. I think most of their ideas are probably already out there, we just don’t carry it!

What’s the strangest thing you’ve seen someone do in the store?
One time, we were out of the Laya, and a customer wanted to buy the display, and he put up quite a fight. I wanted him to understand that hundreds, if not thousands of people had handled this toy. No way in hell would I want to sell it to my worst enemy!

Another time, my co-workers and I were in the midst of preparing to close the store, and while making the rounds to give our customers the five-minute warning, I came across a man holding the Bandit dildo against the outside of his crotch and a woman kneeling in front of him, sucking steadfastly on the dildo. At first, I was in shock, thinking ….she could take more than that. (ha ha — JUST KIDDING). No, really, I think I blurted out “Umm… do you know how many people have touched that toy? And you are putting it in your mouth?!”

Say your mom is going to be coming into the store, what would you tell her to prepare her so she would have an optimal shopping experience?

Grab a shopping basket! They are located on her immediate left upon entering the Polk Street Store!

Any last bit of advice for the GV shopper? Here’s a tip-if GV no longer carries your favorite toy…do not get too stressed out. Things come and go in this industry — and it’s best anyways to not get too attached to any one sex toy. And besides, even if you are, there is probably something very similar to it that we carry. So, just ask! And if we don’t carry it, maybe it’s time to try something new! Remember, variety = the spice of life!