Good Vibrations Magazine

I’m of the opinion that you can learn more about sex by watching someone masturbate to orgasm than by reading any book, taking any class or even having “typical” partnered sex. That’s a pretty serious statement from a sex educator like me, but that’ll tell you just how much I think you can learn by watching someone really get him- or herself off. But besides the educational value, watching authentic masturbation and orgasm also supplies some of the most arousing visual stimulation around.

When people really let go, close their eyes (or maybe not), tune out everything but what feels good and abandon their inhibitions enough to graphically touch themselves in the ways that feel best, the world seems to stop in that one moment of complete focus. The person masturbating touches his or her hot spots, revealing what works best for that individual at each stage of arousal. We see where, how hard, how fast and the various rhythms the person prefers. Their bodies show all of the signs of arousal we read about but seldom see (especially in mainstream porn): nipples hardening, a rosy flush across the chest, neck, and face, and sometimes more. Clits can get firm and erect, testicles expand and then get close to the body. Then there’s the moment of orgasm itself, where the individual’s time-tested techniques are on full display and the body shakes, blood courses through everything, and while breathing hard and gasping, their genitals pulse in blissful contractions. It’s for real — and it’s an eyeful in every respect.

Having your lover put on a show for you is an outrageous thrill, but you can watch as many masturbation shows as you desire in adult videos. Problem is, it’s tough to find videos where the female masturbation isn’t faked, and in straight porn, men usually only masturbate in the three seconds before the “come shot” — very disappointing to those like me who like to watch guys masturbate, too.

To watch men jack off onscreen for more than the those aforementioned three seconds, we must turn to gay male porn or male sexual instructional videos. Though taking a male sex ed video out of context makes me feel a bit dirty, and sometimes a bit silly, they can be a real turn-on. Solo Male Ecstasy fits this bill, showing long scenes of non-porn-looking men taking their sweet time getting themselves off, though the music is beyond my tolerance levels (I turn the sound off). We carry three gay male titles, and of those three, Raiders of the Lost Arse has the best male masturbation scenes, with some pretty rugged, sexy older guys. The men’s well-muscled body types aren’t necessarily to my taste, but I’m well trained in the arts of remote-control-kung-fu and just zip to the parts that “show me the money.”

If you want to watch women masturbate, the world of porn is your oyster. For the real thing, stay away from formulaic plot-driven porn (which usually has to squeeze in an obligatory female masturbation scene) and seek out a series that focuses on women alone (or together), sex ed videos (again, there’s that delightfully dirty feeling) or plot-driven videos directed by women. Mainstream adult videos with women masturbating alone and in pairs tend to have more authentic female orgasms in them, and series such as Screaming Orgasms and Four Finger Club deliver many such scenes. With Screaming, young porn starlets use whatever toys they enjoy getting off with, often explaining to the camera what they like. Then after having an orgasm or two, they hop on a vibrating machine (the pricey Sybian) for more fun. Four Finger Club features more solo and paired starlets, specifically women who get off on penetration from big toys or multiple fingers. You’ll see lots of intense orgasms here, G-spot stimulation and occasionally an authentic female ejaculation.

Women’s sex ed videos contain women who are not like porn stars in appearance (though they’re not always “amateurs”) masturbating to orgasm for educational purposes. But “education” is in the eye of the beholder, no? Here you’ll see less surgical enhancement and “perfection,” and a less rushed feeling around the women’s performances. The videos are generally a little dry in presentation and for some reason always look like they were made in the 1980s, but they provide a wealth of authentic and explicit masturbation demonstrations. The Selfloving video is like eavesdropping on Betty Dodson’s female masturbation workshop and shows all kinds of women masturbating with a wide variety of techniques. Carol Queen’s Great Vibrations and How to Female Ejaculate contain women demonstrating their masturbation techniques directly to the camera, while tapes like Fire in the Valley and Please Don’t Stop feature scenes of women masturbating indirectly for the camera.

Plot-driven porn directed by women has the advantages of higher budgets, filmmaking skill, great storylines, professional porn actors — and authentic female masturbation scenes. Films by Veronica Hart (White Lightning, Taken, Love’s Passion) all have torrid female masturbation scenes in them, and Candida Royalle’s films also make the grade. Not directed by a woman, but with a fantastic female masturbation scene featuring Kylie Ireland (and a glimpse of male masturbation) is Paul Thomas’ Bad Wives 2. And still directed by a woman, but without any plot to get in the way, are all of Chloe’s all-sex videos — Chloe’s I Came, Did You?, Chloe’s Catalina Cum-Ons, and Welcome to Chloeville. Each and every one contains searing masturbation scenes with Chloe and other starlets.

While it might be tinged with irony to seek out masturbation scenes to masturbate to, when you find a masturbation scene that really turns you on, you’ll understand the appeal. Meanwhile, those like me seeking out more male masturbation representation in adult videos will just have to wait — I guess while there’s the obligatory female masturbation scene in mainstream formula porn, it’ll be a while until straight women viewers are given their due with obligatory male masturbation scenes. Until then, it’s back to the video stacks for the likes of me… Happy Masturbation Month, everyone.